The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman [antikvár]

THE LIFE AND OPINIONS OF TRISTRAM SHANDY, GENTLEMAN. CHAPTER I. I WISH either my father or my motlier, or indeed both of them, as they were in duty both equally bound to it, had minded what they were about when they begot me: had they duly considered how much depended upon what they were then doing;—that not only the production of a rational being was concerned in it, but that possibly the happy formation and temperature of his body, perhaps his genius, and the very cast of his mind, and, for aught they knew to the contrary, even the fortunes of his whole house, might take their turn from the humours and dispositions which were then uppermost;—had they duly weighed and considered all this, and proceeded accordingly,—I am verily persuaded I should have made a quite different figure in the world from that in which the reader is likely to see me.—Beheve me, good folks, this is not so inconsiderable a thing as many of you may think it;— you have all, I daresay, heard of the animal spirits, as how they are transfused from father to son, &c. &c.—and a great deal to that purpose:—well, you may take my word, that nine parts in ten of a man's sense, or his nonsense, his successes and miscarriages in this world depend upon their motions and activity, and the different tracks and trains you put them into; so that when they are once set a-going, whether right or wrong, "tis not a halfpenny matter,—away they go cluttering