Goodnews march/april 1994 [antikvár]

all sort of tensions and fears. There lurks in us, too deep to recognise, a question, "Is there anything in all this? Have we been wrong? Is God after all not so wonderful? Has it all been a lovely but wild dream?" These disturbing questions can get pushed down as we busy ourselves with the next project and that is not the way to deal with them. The first step towards our heal-ing is to recognise our need for healing. Atheartweareallself-centredandwhen we become converted we seek God for ourselves. We do not recognise this, but as we run from conference to conference, from book to book, oftcn we are looking for knowledge so that we can pass that knowl-edgeontoothersandbethoughtwise. Man y of the insights that God gives us are really for ourselves first We, especially in the western world, love knowledge. When we know something we, in a sense, master it Alas it is so easy to imagine that knowing something is the same as believing it. Sad to say that is by no means true - spiritual truths aie not leamt quickly. I no w understand why St Benedict kept on sending his monks into the oratory to listen to God's word; then to listen to the Fathers of the Church cxpounding God's word; then to listen to the abbot or a senior monk explaining God's word. He also insisted that his monks did 'lectío divina'. This means to take a phrase from scripture and ponder its meaning, tiy ing to shape your life during that day by that truth. With this constant exposure to God's word, it was hoped that a monk would begin to learn what extraordinary plans God had for him, and that he would begin "to run with un-speakable sweetness in the ways of God." (Rule of St Benedict) When we begin to see our real poverty, that is a moment of grace, because we begin to see our need for a saviour. The danger is we can fail to hear the many scriptural phrases that tell us not to fear. (We can hear them without hearing. I know that for I have done it enough times). Then as we discover our shallowness, we may begin to be ashamed. We then run all the harder, tiying to work more and more for the Lord, when He actually wants us on the operating table. Commi tment is costly. In a world that no longer believes in 'for betteror for worse' t it is all too easy to give up when the going gets rough. It is not that the Lord wants us to have a rough time, but he knows that a rough time can be the only way to get us to see sense. So I do not believe that the vision has faded. I believe many of us have become Marthas and in our enthusiasm to work for the Lord, we have lost the whole poi n t of the stoiy. This is that the Lord wants to work on us and then He wants to use us. What is the good of singing "Melt us, mould us" if we do not mean it? The greatest liberty we can have is to be free from our selfish drives, but getting free from those is like having elastoplaster pulled off a hairy part of the body. It is very veiy painful. ©lan Petit, OSB. OFFICE CHANGES Margaret Brooks, who has worked at the NSC office for a year and a half, left at the end of January as we could not afford a secretary any longer. Margaret did sterling work compiling the prayer group directory, which is still not quite finished. So if anybody still has not sent in details of their prayer group to the office please do so. We wish Margaret all the best for the future. Anne Nolan a teacher who has taken a year out from her work, is helping out at the office in the meantíme two day s a week, but it is possible that the office will not be able tobemannedSdaysaweeknow. Details of office hours, or alternative téléphoné num-bers to contact if closed, will always be given on the answer phone, so we hopefully will be able to continue our service to you. Winefride and Sr. Mary Peter continue to come into the office two days a weck to help with mail orders and other enquiries, and Sr. Marian isiesponsible for Good news subscriptions. Erika Page deals with the accounts on a voluntary basis from home and Vivian Sewell remains responsible for the book stall and music tapes. Kristina Cooper, editor of Goodnews, is also based at the office several days a week, and can be contacted there. The work of the office, which acts as a resource and information centre for Catho-lic Charismatic Renewal, is supported by the book and tape sales, as well as dona- tions. As a result of the recession these are not as great as befóte. Kristina Cooper is now the only salaried member of staff, al-though expenses are given to the volunteers who come in. If you would like to support the work of the office or take out a covenant please write to Sr. Marian, Catholic Charismatic Renewal Office, Alien Hall, 28 Beaufort Street London SW3