Phyllis Diller's Housekeeping hints [antikvár]

Jiiiroduotion This book is the work of Phyllis Diller, the lady with a thousand gags. One thousand and two I forgot her face and figure. Phyllis is the only woman (that's just a wild guess) I know who was refused a subscription to Good Housekeeping. You'll understand why if you've ever visited her home. I did on the bat's day off. Have you ever seen her living room? Have you seen the Surveyor moon pictures? You've seen her living room. The rug is so deep in dust the moths carry a pick and shovel. Her refrigerator door has so many fingerprints on it the FBI uses it to train agents. When it comes to cooking, Phyllis has the Lucrezia Borgia seal of approval. The last time she had a picnic the ants picketed. You've heard about people who can't boil water? Phyllis can she calls it soup. Her kitchen is so poorly organized she keeps a mouse on a leash so she can find the cheese. She shops between the main course and dessert. She has the only dining room table I know with a garbage disposal for a centerpiece. And you can be sure her family always brushes after every meal it's so convenient . . . they're always so close to the toothbrush. So who's better qualified to write a book on "What's New in Housekeeping?" Bob Hope